Reply To: Frustrated Mothers of Girls: Can we hear your ideas

Home Forums Shidduchim Frustrated Mothers of Girls: Can we hear your ideas Reply To: Frustrated Mothers of Girls: Can we hear your ideas



I will repeat a familiar qoute of einstein

Insanity is to do the same thing again and again and expect different results.

you would like for there to be no communal effort and no effort at large to deal with a indentified cause of the shidduch crisis. Let every person fend for themselves and wish the problem away….

Hey wait isn’t that what we were doing when we got ourselves into this mess?

Why do you think that by going back to that method will solve it?

(as an aside, i assume you would like to not only shut down the NASI Project, but all the other wonderful projects going on such as communites who “gasp” hire a shadchan to assist their local young women (LA, CHicago, Detroit, Baltimore, and others), as well as numerous active organziations

Binyan Adei Ad


Sheefa Links,

Yu Connects,



and many others….

I mean in Europe they didn’t do that????

now for some specific points:

I will argue, that our religion and mesorah require of us, that ANY and EVERY need that is indentified and can be alleviated or solved through individual or communal activism should be pursued (of course under the guidance of proper people who are of the stature to give such guidance.)

People and commuities who sit back and don’t do what THEY could have done will have to face the music after 120.

THAT my friend is what Hashem expects of us, and that is the mesorah of our gedolim and that is why our gedolim involved themselves in many areas that they would have much preffered not to be involved in.

Judaism is NOT a copycat religion. Before launching dor yeshorim they didn’t research whether in Europe they did genetic testing. What they did do is seek guidance from leaders as to whether such activism is approprioate based on the knowledge they had and the capabilites to act.

ditto the bais yackov movement, ditto hatzlah, ditto rccs, ditto bonei olam, ditto ditto ditto.

I’m not sure where in shulchan aruch it says that prior to helping allieviated a massive communal problem, one is supposed to research whether such chesed scenarios ever previously presented themselves.

What i believe my friend is that you don’t like the specific action plan of a specific program.

You are entitled to your opinion, as were the people whe were against dor yeshorim, sara schinerer, haztzalah.

You may even be right, but please leave the mesorah argument out of it, and discuss the pertinent issues.

2. I’m not quite sure what “I speculate – and I stress speculate – that it may be OUR mess up by overstepping our Hishtadlus obligations.”

Are up specualting the shidduch difficulites are a result of peoples efforts to sovle the problem???