Along that theme, we’ll see if this makes it past the censors.
There was once this couple who owned a grocery store. The wife was a powerful personality, and the husband was very dominated. If he disappointed her in any way, she’d pull out a paddle and give him a whack.
One day, she left him in charge of the grocery store. Came time to daven mincha, and he was late. He ran out of the store without locking the door, figured it was safe. How long does mincha take anyway?
He came back 12 minutes later, and found the place cleaned out. He went home and told his wife the bad news. She blew a gasket, and really gave it to him with the paddle.
At that beating, he decided he’d had enough, and demanded a divorce. So they went to the rav. After hearing the 2 sides of the dispute, the rav said, “This is the first time a couple came to me where SHE said ‘Pesach Pasuach Matzasi’ and HE tayna’d ‘Mukas Eitz!'”