RSRH, can you give me the citations? All those rishonim dealt with absolute Goyish monarchies.Jews were not considered subjects but guests.
The autonomous Jewish kehillot, on the other hand, were organized more or less democratically (there were limitations as to who had the right to vote – such as paying taxes – with which the Rishonim dealt as well as limitations on the power of the majority over the minority and the power of minhag as a basis for law).
The Rashbam says (Baba Batra 54b) that the basis for dina demalchuta dina is popular acceptance of the government even if not unanimous and that an individual cannot opt out. If I remember correctly the Rashba holds that shutafut is the basis of the kehilla and also holds that an individual may not opt out.The problem you cite is solved by the idea of rubo kekulo (Rema Choshen Mishpat 163:1)and representative bodies (shiva tuvei ha’ir – see Choshen Mishpat 2:1 with Rema). .Rav Shachter discusses specifically the issue of taxes (it can be found in “Einayim L’Torah”, Volume 20, Number 9 and is available on-line) but it is clear from the that the community council (or whatever representative body is established) has the power to enact laws for public order and safety as does a king.Much has been written on this subject by modern poskim and articles can be found in publications such as “Techumin”.