I find that the reaction you bring up most often happens when people have a lack of respect for one another.
Instead of accepting that not everyone holds the same way about everything people lash out when they see a difference.
Ideally, we should all be able to ask questions and share ideas. Problems arise when certain groups of people see an opinion that does not match (or even conflicts) with their opinion and they immediately go into attack mode.
Interestingly, so much of our learning is based on debates and discussions and yet when it happens here in the CR people immediately attack each other. I find it so peculiar how certain groups of people claim to strive for kedusha and yet will call anyone with a different tradition than theirs an apikores.
It’s a shame and it stifles good stimulating discussion.