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Dear Puhlease- When I was in seminary, one of my rabbis gave me a piece of information i will NEVER forget. Don’t judge Judaism based off Jews. Jews can sometimes be “less than perfect” to say the least, but that shouldn’t reflect on the religion itself. There is a story of a survivor in a concentration camp who went OTD because he couldn’t believe that a man made people give him their meager potions of bread for one time use of his siddur. How could a Jew be so greedy? The survivor was reprimanded- do not look at the man who took the bread; look at all those who were willing to give up their bread to pray with a siddur. I would love to be in touch with you more if you’re open to it!