Gavra: If you get a discount on a coat, are you also considered as accepting charity? Some schools inflate their rates to “leave room to negotiate”. Besides, you can’t assume that everybody struggling isn’t paying full tuition. Perhaps the reason they are struggling is because they don’t want to bargain on schar limud. Perhaps, as the OP of the tzeddakah thread they don’t even have school age children. Putting tuition into this conversation to be able to dictate how others spend their money seems unfair to me.
If we are discussing tuition and chumras are fair play I’d say this: All those struggling and their kids aren’t in chasiddeshe yeshivas let them switch. Tuition can be in the $200 range per month per child! If they are modern they may need to dump their tv/internet, wife will need to cover her hair etc., but we “obviously” have a right to dictate others religious practices so they shouldn’t need to get tuition breaks… They may even need to move to a chasidish neighborhood and start speaking yiddish, but hey many here feel we can dictate where people live. And it’s not easy to get into some schools so they shouldn’t be picky and try the bigger ones which are a little easier even if their hashkafos don’t mesh– all in the name of savings. Many schools will accept kids that “don’t blend in” if they live in the neighborhood and the parents abide by the rules.
At the other extreme we can start discussing public school with homeschooling limudei kodesh. Where does the “dumping of chumros” stop?