Reply To: Fertility concerns about a prospective shidduch

golfer,

You can’t tell boys potential problems like that before they even meet up or it could effect the shiduchim. When boys and girls first meet, unless they know the family anyway, IMO they shouldn’t know much more than the name of the other side. Let them get to know each other and see if they like each other without any side issues clouding the meeting.

If it then gets more serious but before it gets very serious, say after 4 dates, then IMO it’s the correct time to let him know of any potential possible issues. That way he can make an informed decision regarding this particular girl rather than just about ‘an issue’.

CAD, I guarantee you that if we decide not to go ahead with this Shidduch we will not let them know it was because of this concern. We’ll tell them that the boy and girl aren’t suited, so some other parev excuse. We wouldn’t cause them Agmas Nefesh.