Very strong language. “I hate ????? ????! It is the worst!” How about, “What a disappointment! No super short parsha this year!”
Nitzavim must always be the Shabbos before Rosh Hashana. If Rosh Hashana will start on Monday or Tuesday, then there will be a Shabbos between Yom Kippur and sukkos. That will be Parshas Haazinu, Vayelech will be Shabbos Shuva, and Nitzavim all alone. If Rosh Hashana starts on Thursday or Shabbos, there will not be a Shabbos between YK and Sukkos. That leaves HAazinu on Shabbos Shuva, and Vayelech to join up with Nitzavim. This is totally independant of any other cheshbonos that cause any other parshiyos to join together or to remain separate.