Dear luv2Bjewish,
Many of us here empathize with your discomfort with all the rules and restrictions. But as The Wolfman intimated above, if you buy into the system, you can’t really complain about the rules.
There are other legitimate systems out there, and don’t let anyone make you feel bad about them. If the yeshivish-shidduch system isn’t to your liking, try a different one. B’hatzlachah.