Reply To: Ahava=hav But why?

avner-“Your true self is the decisions you make to overcome your nature.So by giving, you are overcoming your nature, and building yourself. But when the giving is brought on by the other, they become part of your self, thus you love them.”

The idea that your self is the decisions you make, and by overcoming your nature you are improving your essence is very profound-and I feel like you are on to something, however I do not understand the connection between that and that the person who brought about this betterment in you becomes a part of you. If some one were to give you constructive criticism(tochacha) or advice on how to shteig, does he too become a part of your self?