“I am married 32 years k”h (tu! spit ont the floor!) “
Me, too!
I have never heard that the l’chaim has a religious standing exactly, though certainly a culturally significant one. If tenoim are signed, it is the “erusin” part of the wedding, and the kedushin take place when the chosson says the harei aht. Because there is a fear that an engagement may break off, most people nowadays have the tenoim/erusin at the actual wedding. I was always told that to break actual tenoim (more serious than a broken engagement) is akin to a divorce, because when the kallah is m’uresses (which is a change of status much more serious than merely “engaged”), she is forbidden to another man, just as if she were already an eishes ish. Learned men out there, am I misspeaking about this???