always runs with scissors fast: As a mother of 3yr old and 1yr old I can understand how frustrating it is when children get into things they shouldn’t and make big messes. I just finished taking a parenting course from Simi Yellen who was AMAZING!!! So I’ll offer you some suggestions I learned from the course which I hope can help you a little. Firstly, you should always put away or lock up anything you do not want your kids getting into. That means getting cabinet locks for your kitchen, bathroom, etc. You can also see about locking up the kitchen for the night as I do, and maybe even the bathroom too. Secondly, you should teach your child that what she did was not right, and she should apologize to you for it. She should also help you clean up the mess to teach her that messes need to be cleaned up. You can try to make it fun by making it fun, either with a race against you, or the timer. You sing her a song, be silly with her while cleaning up etc. If she is not willing to help you clean up, then you need to give her a consequence by taking something away from her that she really likes. You should also teach her not to bother the baby, and give her consequences if she does.
Another suggestion is try to have more positive experiences with your children, by constantly finding things to elaborately praise them for. Spending quality time with each child every day (at least 10min) I know this can be very difficult if you are a single mom.) Do something with them just because you love them etc.
Lastly, I know this costs money, and I know you are financially tight right now, but I think it will be very worth while for you and your kids to take a 6 week parenting course for ages 2-5 by Simi Yellen. The next course is starting in early July.
Hatzlocho Rabba with everything. I hope you get some household help, and I hope your situation with your children improves very quickly.