WIY – your original premise: “It seems that a husband is obligated to make his wife happy. Meaning without him she wouldn’t be happy.”
It seems that the truth of the premise would depend on how one defines happiness and/or the word “vesimach”.
Is happiness finite?
Could vesimach mean to make happier?
If say happiness came from feeling fulfilled, wouldn’t there be an objective and subjective measure of it, much like life itself?
If my last hypothesis is correct, a way of fitting psychology into the truth that is the torah would be as follows:
Subjectively, any person can find their mission and accomplish whatever they can. Feeling fulfilled is a result of actually doing whatever you were able to do, wherever and whoever you are.
However, if a person is blessed enough to be in a situation where their mission is truly objectively big (say a person is moshiach), the happiness of feeling fulfilled after such a huge accomplishment would be far greater.
A woman who is married (to a deserving man), says the torah, is in a position to objectively accomplish more, and therefore objectively feel a more intense fulfillment.
This was completely speculative and perhaps gibberish.