Opponents of same-sex marriage don’t “hate” gays. This is a highly ideological canard widely used by the left to delegitimize not only political opposition to gay marriage, but also religions (such as ours!) that disapprove of homosexual behavior.
We don’t hate gays at all — we just disagree on what the proper response is to people’s same-sex desires (embrace them and normalize them vs. ignore or suppress them and refrain from acting on them).
In fact, many opponents of toieva marriage have expressed great caring and compassion for those with same sex attraction, because it must a very difficult nisayon, and very hard to know what to do about it. This comes across very clearly in some Orthodox rabbinical statements regarding homosexuality (many of the signatories of which are certainly against gay marriage).