Reply To: Possible solution to the shidduch crisis

WIY: you bring up a very important point. I think that boys and girls start going out before they are mature enough. I am not talking about age-wise, I’m talking about girls and boys who come right out of yeshiva/ seminary or high school, not knowing who they are and therefore not knowing what they want in a spouse. If everyone developed a deep sense of self awareness and self introspection maybe everyone would be able to articulate what they want in a spouse, exactly what they are looking for and not something esoteric and general as ” ya’arei shamayim”. That means something different for everyone. Does that mean he’s going to go to minyan 3 times a day, or someone who is meticulous and machnir with kashruth. Or a Baal/as middos. Everyone should have three or so middos that they really want in a spouse and a few other middos that are negotiable. If everyone had a clearer idea of what they wanted that they would be able to articulate ,redting shidduchim would be much easier