“jewishf- firstly, i never spoke about that. that wasnt the topic of discussion. we were arguing whehter a mans taava to look is bigger or not than a womans taava to dress inappropriately. agav, this nekuda came up when i was being miva’er the inyan, and from what i heard from a few people, the feelings and thoughts are different even when a woman has a taavah to look.”
“i never spoke about that”– EXACTLY. You talk about “a man’s nisayon” and “a woman’s nisayon” as if men looking and women dressing were the ONLY nisyonos that exist with regard to tznius. Not true. And I don’t believe for a second that “the feelings and thoughts are different”. Different how? If a man is looking at a woman in an ervah way versus a woman looking at a man in an ervah way, it’s exactly the same taiva. I don’t understand. Obviously if it gets to the point of thinking “I sure wish I could do xyz with this person” the xyz part is different because of biology. But what relevance does that have to anything at all?
I am not trying to pick on you specifically. This is a widespread attitude that people have and it drives me crazy.