First of all, what is the opposite of respect? Disrespect. So therefore when I say that we cannot respect people who violate halacha openly, willfuly and constantly, I am not saying that I hate them.
Disrespecting people’s sinful actions does not mean that I hate them. On the contrary I pity the spiritual and oftentimes physical decline of people who shed every vestige of Yiddishkeit.
Every human, even the biggiest tzaddikim made mistakes, so kol shekein us little people, we all make mistakes in our lives. Yes we all have failings and we all sometimes sin, but in general we try to be good Jews.But there is a vast difference between people who are frum and those who are not interested in any connection to Yiddishkeit and purposefully do aveiros.
Immorality and genievah by the goyim anger Hashem. Why do you think he made the mabul? Did Hashem not turn over Sedom because of their sins? Was the Beis Hamikdosh not destroyed because of our sins? Sin is a major, major issue not just something that “oh, yeah we can’t judge these people, let’s respect their choices anyway.”
The reason why there this cavalier attitude to those who violate halacha is because we don’t realize the immense responsibility that a Jew who was born into a frum (yes, maybe sometimes frum krum, but still frum) environment, he/she was given the knowledge that there’s a God who created us, that there are obligations of mitzvos to keep, that we are souls not just gufim, that life is not a free for all, that we MUST live our lives according to halacha, this is not soemthing one can throw away because they were abused, or think of their parents/teachers as hypocrites or whatever other excuse they have.
Just as Hashem gave into each human to know the difference of right and wrong, immorality, stealing, murdering, a person instinctively knows that this is wrong, every Jew who turns away from Yiddishkeit knows that this is wrong. They just silence their inner voice with a barrage of excuses.
I may pity these OTD people, I may love them as they have a Jewish soul and the potential for teshuva, but I certainly DO NOT RESPECT THEM.