Yungerman from Lakewood,
so I can’t bring myself to do tshuva for aveiros that I do not believe in.
What do I do?
Your problem is not isolated to people with doubts – it is a universal issue. When a person sins, most of the time he is not thinking “heh heh heh, I know I’m doing wrong but I’m doing it anyway!” Usually there are two conflicting desires within a person (I should give the $5 in my pocket to that poor person, but I really want to use it to buy some french fries later), a noble desire and a base desire, and the person rationalizes a way to fulfill the base desire, sometimes even convincing himself that he’s doing the right thing (the poor person will just probably buy alcohol with it anyway). So, in a way, at the time of the commission of the aveira, the person “does not believe in the aveira” as you said.
So how should you “deal” with Yom Kippur? The same way that all Jews should. Take some time to examine your actions (and the motivations for your actions) during the past year and decide whether all of those actions reflect the type of person you would like to be. Usually when we pare down our rationalizations, the true, base motivations for a lot of our actions can make us feel embarrassed. Feel regret for these failures, but tell yourself and Hashem that they do not reflect who you are. Think of something realistic you can do during the upcoming year that will help you to come closer to being the person you truly want to be. Pray for the time, health, and ability to do this work.
Please G-d I should be able to do all of this myself as well and that we will all have a year of sweet goodness.