Hello Assaf
I, too, am a mother of a son who chose a different lifestyle from his upbringing. It was very painful for us. We were always concerned about this child and his health issues, and we turned over the world, sparing no money or time from addressing his issues, although my husband and I do not have much of either. When he finally came clean with us, he was angry, disrespectful, and quite frankly, cruel and mean.
He has since totally retracted himself, and is trying to find his way back into our lives while maintaining his independence. He is truly trying to be a good son.
My husband is a tzaddik, he behaves to him as if nothing has happened, ignoring his incredible pain, because of his love for his son which is unending. Although I have accepted him as a repentant son, I do not imagine myself ever trusting him again, and he feels this and is pained by it. At this point, he alone is suffering from his choices, as I have emotionally moved on.
Assaf you sound like a mature and sensitive young man. I strongly request that you come clean (gently)with your parents. First of all, we are only human. Witholding such an important part of your life can only backfire at some point, as it did with my son who held himself for way too long (at least five years). Second, (I realize that I am speaking as someone who believes, I can only speak from such a place) Hashem will help them with this journey. They will, at some point, come to terms with their new reality. And both sides will find their peace, bezrat Hashem.
On another note, I personally do not think that you need to wait for them to come to Israel. I think that the distance (phone calls, letters, etc. whatever you are comfortable with) may soften the blow. They will probably want to come shortly thereafter to see you.
Assaf- may your sensitivity and kibbud av v’aim stand as a zchus for you, and may you find your happiness and peace within our people. May you be matzliach in maintaining your parents relationship through this difficult time.
Hatzlocha vebrocha