Virtually all of the above (some of which I did not yet read, because this was so lengthy), but also, people who say nukular, when they mean to say nuc-lear, axe, when they mean ask, and
“I could care less,” when the actual expression is “I could NOT care less.” The former phrase means the precise opposite of its intent. What they are actually saying is, they care a LOT, and they mean to say they don’t care at all.