You had a bad experience. Even when I was failing gemara my rebbies encouraged me. Why don’t you get involved in an organization that pairs you off with other girls (I’m assuming you are a girl from the way you type) and teach them or learn with someone at the same level.
Halfway through typing this answer, I realized that this is similar to what happened to me this past year and that I need to forgive that educator. Who am I to give you advice if I only preach and not practice? <—- Thank you for being The Almighty’s messenger to tell me to work on myself and forgive people.
All that is left to say is to try to judge them favorably, who knows, the teacher could of had a lot of things going on in his/her life.
I feel bad I can’t offer you more but try my suggestions even if I may not do them myself.
You should be blessed that this is you pass this hard trial in life and that this experience will strengthen you.