Getzel, you raise an interesting point. Two points in response:
1. The Torah and Rabbeinu Gershom arguably don’t express a preference for remaining married; they express a preference for dual consent. It’s not clear that the desired outcome was more refusal to divorce, it’s possible that the desired outcome was an autonomous participation in divorce.
2. Regardless of what the law says and what “rights” it represents, the law is forced to apply indiscriminately (although R’ Gershom left an “out”.) The women who demand divorces might argue that the law cannot help them because the law gives a “right” to all the nice men out there. But their husbands should still not be jerks.
UNRELATED: I don’t understand why this has become a “Crisis” with a capital C. There are a lot of ways that people can be mean to each other, and a lot of ways in which laws are inequitable toward men and women. People should always be menschen, but there is nothing unique about “gets” that should arouse such an outcry.