Giving a teenager space is a famous rule. You can read or hear about that in any parenting book. You avoid the teen issues by focusing on Chinuch when they are still young and cute. That is the time to instil values. Even then, personality has to be taken into account.
This great secret has not been overlooked. It is the guiding factor in all advice given to parents of teens. Every generation hhad people falling out. Adam Le’amal Yulad. We are here to work, not to have been born perfect. Bad choices, bad parenting, warped thought patterns, and messed up emotions, are as inevitable as pot holes.
There are flaws in all areas of nature. Surely we keep trying to fix things. We constantlly try to fight poverty, beetles, disease, fungus, bad weather, laziness, crime, the Yetzer Hara, ignorance, and decay. And we know that we will never end the fight. New challenges will always come up. However, if we stop the fight we lose everything. But this doesn’t mean it is a lost cause if there are still crime and potholes.