Jfem – you said: “I can’t speak for men, but I do know that women (based on my experiences and those of my friends I would even say most women) . . . desire [unknown men].”
How is it that you “can’t speak for men” but could speak for “my friends”? Are you saying you don’t know any men?
Additionally, even if you could accurately speak for your friends, it may be a stretch to project their experiences onto “most” [religious] women. It may just be a flawed sample.
While women too were created with some animalistic tendencies, they are [thankfully] not nearly as overpowering as those that men have, giving women a far, far, easier time controlling inappropriate thoughts. Witness in the secular world, who is trying to convince whom to be immoral sooner.
That said, women can likely desensitize themselves, and sacrifice some of their inherent advantage over men in this area.
Feminists and their friends, who campaign against things like abstinence education, and advocate for things like birth control to be more and more available, to younger and younger women, are likely desensitized, and are therefore a flawed sample.
All that said, when a woman dresses within the realm of normal, and is far less exposed than what we all see regularly in the world around us, it should not be a nisayon for most men, and therefore, it should not be our business. Individuals who have issues should work on themselves.