Rabbi Al, i’m so sorry. there are no words.
as a general rule, BH, those stories dont happen anymore in the average yeshiva, both in town and out of town, but unfortunately, there are definitely still stories in current chassidish yeshivos. i do not mean to slight the chassidish system in general; i have friends and family in a wide range including chassidish, yeshivish, heimish, modern orthodox.
as to dealing with difficult ppl/bullies, we all encounter some manner of ppl like this, and it is important to be honest with ourselves about how we’d like to react. it really depends for different ppl. for some ppl, the best thing is to stay as far away from them as possible and to have as little contact as possible. for some, this is not always possible as in the case of family. for some ppl, they are able to interact and not be terribly bothered by it. some ppl are passive aggressive and pretend to smile but are extremely angry inside. that is not helpful. if deciding to confront someone, it is important to think long and hard about what the outcome might be and what we hope to accomplish, because oftentimes ppl regret it. but if there’s any hope of making changes, as in the case of family, then sometimes it’s worth communicating.
on the other hand, because i counsel all sorts of ppl, i’ve encountered the bully perspective as well. though of them really are mean spirited ppl, and some may have serious diagnosis like personality disorders, some are just socially inept, and many many ppl just dont see how they are perceived by others. some might be horrified to hear how they are perceived by others. in some cases, it’s a matter of “kamayim hapanim lapanim”, where there’s some perceived slight, and they think they are reacting in kind. i do believe that in some cases, relationships can be repaired by open communication. i also know cases, personally and professionally, where someone turned up the charm, so to speak, and were able to change the relationship, and it really did turn things around.
and as oomis noted, it is our responsibility to be concerned with our own actions. when we have a difficult person in our life, or a one time difficult encounter, it is a test from Hashem about how we react. the difficult individual is just the messenger. at the end of the day, we want to stay as far away from macklokes as possible.