I was brought up in a frum, tzioni home. I was very active in Bnai Akiva. We saw the chareidim as very close minded and judgemental, never having a clue why what we learned and observed was ‘inadequate’. Had we not been Shomer Shabbos it might have made sense to us but we didn’t know what their complaints were.
When I hit my late teens I worked in a camp with some kids from BY. They were ‘normal’ and answered a million of my questions. I started making different changes and found my old chevra to be very judgemental and close minded to my changes, so much like what we accused the others of being.
When I became a Bnos leader I listened to the young girls insult and put down people from the more modern schools, but most of what they said was from ignorance. I explained to them how mistaken they were and was also explaining to my old friends how mistaken they were. I too felt I lived with one foot in each door.
As an adult, I have chosen a more chareidi lifestyle, but you know kids, they are either knocking those who are different, or wishing they could join them. They knock people I grew up respecting, and they also knock the hypocrisy of their own daled amos. If only there was more of an understanding of where everyone else was at, there would be less animosity on one hand, and less thinking the grass is greener on the other hand.
But meanwhile I find myself always explaining, always trying to bridge the gap, always thinking that if i just explain the fallacy of their thinking I could make shalom somewhere.