Mezinka

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  • #600492
    oomis
    Participant

    A friend of mine is marrying off her last child, B”H. When I mentioned to her she has a mezinka, she was a little confused about how thios custom is followed? When in the wedding reception should it be done, and aside from the laurels (which she will absolutely not put on her head), what is typically done, and in what order (i.e., who dances first around the parents, when is the broom used, etc.)?

    #825825
    old man
    Participant

    As in all such suspect parochial minhagim, it is dealer’s choice. There are no rules. If it were me, I would ask a close friend how she did it, and then do more or less the same. No one will be wiser, and everyone will (or should be) happy. Keep it stress free.

    #825826
    sem graduate
    Member

    My husband is the youngest and there was therefore a mezinka dance at my wedding – basically, i sat near my mother in law and grandmother and all the grandaughters stood in pairs with brooms and roses and they did a dance and at the end of each round – the front pair came forward and gave my mother in law the rose and a kiss…. all the daughters danced around in a circle while this was happening… it was very nice… because it was a chassidish wedding, by the mitzva dance, all the men took broomsticks and danced for my father in law when they were called up…

    #825827
    ZeesKite
    Participant

    I once heard that it’s not a Jewish minhag at all. Cannot back it up though. It’s is a very touch subject.

    #825828

    It is a Chassidishe minhag.

    When marrying off our youngest i was very against it. However, a few days/nights before the wedding my son happened to come across the minhag in a sefer(i will ask him if he remembers the source and yes this son is a real talmid chachim and full time real learner) and we went with the theme. On the womens side the girls and young ladies danced around me first and then other forms of us dancing with the brooms and then the men got the brooms and they had their dance. Being it was after Purim the men wore Yerushalmi levush. There was no mixed dancing at all!

    There are gemachs that rent out very nice brooms for this purpose, i am sure at least one of them know the source.

    Mazel Tov and lots of nachas!

    #825829
    yitayningwut
    Participant

    ZeesKite –

    I heard R’ Moshe Heinemann say it’s a Polish custom. He didn’t say that it’s a problem, just that this happens to be the fact.

    #825830
    aries2756
    Participant

    The way I always saw it done was somewhere near the end of the wedding on the women’s side the couple are seated and the immediate family dance around them, with the brooms. Extended family like the parents brothers and sisters might join in at the end. Then the parents might join at the very end to dance with the kids and sweep them out especially the chassan and Kallah.

    It can be very emotional and touching, especially if there are grandparents involved who were zoche to see their children marry off all of their children.

    #825831
    passfan
    Member

    yitayningwut is correct. It is a custom by the Polish and Ukrainian peasants that some Jews from that area copied and brought over with them.

    #825832
    oomis
    Participant

    Thanks for all the information and mazel tovs (though I am happy for my friend, it is her child, not mine who is getting married at this time). I especially liked the idea of the girls dancing around and giving the mother a rose. My friend and her husband both come from Bobover Chassidim (though they are a little more modern rather than chassidish), so I wonder if there are any Bobovoer minhagim. Anyone?

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