Shabbos Guest – Bring gift for host?

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    When our girls were away at school and invited Shabbos guests they ,would bring purchased gifts the first couple of times they went to a specific home. After that they were likely to send a thank you note with a card enclosed that said good for an evening’s babysitting….so the hosts could have some free time. They told Mrs CTL and Me that this was far more appreciated than another bottle of wine or a box of chocolates.


    CTL, what did your sons do after having been a guest at the same home so many times?

    🍫Syag Lchochma

    Offered to learn a mishna in their zchus


    When they learned in Brooklyn after high school in CT and before college/Law school their Yeshiva dorm was less than 3 blocks from my paternal grandparents’ home and those of Grandma’s three sisters. These were the only homes they ate in while in Brooklyn. Zaidy and his brothers in law were more apt to be giving the boys bottles of booze and cash and the women gave food goodies to take back to yeshiva. The boys would run errands for these elder family members, do chores in the homes and drive them to shopping, etc.
    Both went to college and Law school at Penn and if going to a family for Shabbos they took a bottle for the adults and candy for the children. I don’t think any hosts were regular stops. They did not have Friday classes and came home most Thursday nights. If they had reason to stay in Philadelphia they generally ate in their own apartment. They were/are competent cooks and bakers.

    Amil Zola

    I think that some of us grew up in a time when sending a ‘bread and butter’ note was expected after dining with someone. And at the same time I was also taught to bring a gift upon arriving as a house or dinner guest was just plain good manners.


    I have never seen anyone bring a gift on shabbos.
    Flowers before shabbos are the ultimate gift imho. Sems along some antihistamine just in case.

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