Guy's Shidduch Resume' « YWN Coffee Room

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Guy's Shidduch Resume'

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Started 4 months ago by chaimss
Latest reply from mom12

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chaimss
Member

So I'm starting to get into *that* part of my life (read: the Dating Scene) and I've been searching online for ideas of how to put together my shidduch resume'. Now, considering that I'm a "computer geek" through and through I turned to my Source of All Human Knowledge: Google. While I did find many articles about girls' resume's, funny resume's, exaggerated resume's, etc. I found no serious guidelines for what a guy should put on his resume'. Yes, I know I could actually go and _ask_ someone, but I thought I'd get more diverse answers if I asked here.

So... How do I design my shidduch resume'? (Remember, I'm asking seriously, so please don't say 'what tablecloth do you use?' ;) ) Thanks!

Posted 4 months ago #
Think first
Member

Name
Address
Dob
Hight

Schools attended

Current occupation

Breif disrciption of urself

Type girl ur looking for.. Family, backround, personality etc.

Names of ur parents and occupations

Name Siblings and where what they are

references: people whom they can call and ask about you. Can be a friend, Rebbe,co worker etc.

Hope this helped

Posted 4 months ago #
Imaofthree
Member

Dor Yeshorim number

Posted 4 months ago #
dunno
Better Late than Never!

I would leave out the description...

Posted 4 months ago #
yungerman1
Member

You can include summer camps, and who siblings married if relevant.

Posted 4 months ago #
bpt
never caustic

Where you daven. (and if you don't have a set place, PICK ONE, ASAP) as that will enable people to see you in your best setting. Especially, if you're still in yeshiva, as when anyone goes to scope you out in the BM, you are among 100+ guys just like you.

At this point in life, you want to be the focus of attention, not part of the herd.
----------------------------------------
Personally, I would scratch "height". Its (IMHO) irrelevant, both on your part and on hers. Weight, you can (to some extent)control, height is a fact.

Posted 4 months ago #
koillel101
tuna baigel

Height can be important because a boy who is short(5' 5") can be a little awkward with a 5'9" girl.

Posted 4 months ago #
popa_bar_abba
Incorrigible; semi-retarded; eccentric; perhaps a woman; not Mod 80. Sometimes a bit over the top.

Nothing. You don't need one. You will rarely if ever be asked for one.

Posted 4 months ago #
chaimss
Member

Thanks everyone. Popa- I've already been asked a number of times if I had one, that's why I started. It's the "brief" and "etc." parts I'm trying to figure out- Do I go through a whole laundry list of things I enjoy or just things I think are important that she share with me? And would I be listed as a ba'al gaivah if I say something like (this isn't true, btw): "I try to learn every spare moment I have and have already finished Shas Bavli and Shas Mishnayos" i.e. should I highlight my positives or is that wrong?

Posted 4 months ago #
shuli
Member

dont. makes you sound like a showoff. to me at least

Posted 4 months ago #
WIY
Member

Chaimss
Are you kidding me? You finished shas mishnayos and gemara and are only Shidduchim aged?! (low 20s) Wow Im very impressed if its true (regardless of your age) although I am surprised someone like that has time to waste on the net.

Posted 4 months ago #
estrapade
Member

Stick only to the basic facts. Your DOB/height may serve as immediate disqualifiers. As will your parents' names. Therefore, it will save time to have it on the resume.

The description, what you're looking for, etc. can be discussed verbally with the Shadchan.

Hatzlucha!

Sample Resume:

Name
DOB
Height

Yeshivas attended

Occupation

Parents' names & occupations
John Smith, Baker
Jane Smith, Homemaker

Siblings' names and yeshiva/occupations
Jeff Smith, Attorney
Jerry Smith, 17, Yeshivas Coffee Room
Judith Smith, 15, Beis Yaakov Coffee Room

Shul

References
(list married friends, Rabbi, maybe a single friend from Yeshiva)

Posted 4 months ago #
OneOfMany
Today, Nymphadora is sporting One Of her Many noses ^_^

Lol...reminds me of this one:
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/help-how-do-i-make-a-shidduch-resume

Posted 4 months ago #
popa_bar_abba
Incorrigible; semi-retarded; eccentric; perhaps a woman; not Mod 80. Sometimes a bit over the top.

reminds me of this one:
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com/coffeeroom/topic/help-how-do-i-make-a-shidduch-resume

Hee hee.
That one I wrote there is really funny. I'm impressed with my month and a half ago self.

Posted 4 months ago #
adams
Member

Is he always quiet on date, or are there cases where he is interested in the girl and is still quiet?

I think he needs some therapy in how to make a conversation, the art of, if you will.

He can ask her some quesitons, what does she do, what sort of things she likes, her family, where she grew up, school, etc.
there can be a list of things he can ask. Each question will generate a response and possibly a question from her.

Other areas of interest, travel, politics, learning, reading.

Perhaps he should keep the first date short, perhaps 90 minutes.

So he won't run out of points on that list.

If there is interest a second date should have some activity be it a lecture, a shiur, etc. so they can discuss this.

If the interest proceeds further I believe he should tell her that his is not comfortable with conversations like that and let her decide how to take that.

By keeping his secret it won't help.

Hatzlacha, it sounds like this is solvable.

Posted 4 months ago #
DaasYochid
Member

Adams,

I think you posted on the wrong thread.

Posted 4 months ago #
chaimss
Member

Estrapade- So you think I should cut that all out? Even though it will probably be my first impression on the girl/family? I know from the guy side I have a friend who turned down a girl just because her resume' wasn't that informative, girls won't do that? (That isn't sarcastic or anything, I'm asking because I have no idea how these work.)

OOM & Popa- Haha! In fact that was one of the threads Google picked up when I was searching, but alas, it was for a girl.

Posted 4 months ago #
OneOfMany
Today, Nymphadora is sporting One Of her Many noses ^_^

popa: A friend of mine posted that on an email group to a whoooooole bunch of girls. We all found it funny. (Hope you don't mind) :D

Posted 4 months ago #
estrapade
Member

Chaimss - Why don't you just ask your shadchan what is acceptable for your shidduch resume? Alternatively, ask your friends to see theirs.

Posted 4 months ago #
Maurice85
Member

write what you would like to see when you get a resume from a girl

Posted 4 months ago #
chaimss
Member

Estrapade- Like I mentioned in my first post, I could (and I have) spoken with my friends, etc. but I figured I'd get more diverse results here, knowing the chashove community we have here.

Posted 4 months ago #
golden mom
Member

and attach a picture

and pls dont do ur resume in question and answer format it is very weird and annoying to read

Posted 4 months ago #
YW Band
Member

Mothers: I just heard from my Rav this Shabbos saying that just like Shifra & Puah got their names for doing a small thing like mothering Moshe Rabbeinu & that is what makes a gadol

You should never feel embarrassed to put on the resume that your a homemaker! never try to run away from real instincts!

of course, paransah is important...

Posted 4 months ago #
mom12
Member

moms maiden name is important.
height is important. weight not necessary.
machatunim- if any
yeshivos that u learnt in.
and basically what you would like in a girl.
l'vush.. weekday and shabbos.
these are the details any shadchan would ask you..

Posted 4 months ago #

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Guy's Shidduch Resume'

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