can't say made this one up, but it's one everyone knows:
there once was a maid from japan
whose limericks never would scan
when questioned why
she replied "because I
trytofitasmanysyllablesintotheconcludinglineofthelimerickasIpossiblycan"
YWN Coffee Room » Humor & Entertainment
Limericks!
(775 posts)-
Posted 4 years ago #
-
Did I hear you say "rare disease"
I beg you to reconsider please
This is more accurately a pleasure
Of the very highest measure
Now don't you go be a teasePosted 4 years ago # -
minyan gal, to you I must say
Kudos for coming to play
In this sandbox of ours
Building castles and towers
From words as if it were clayPosted 4 years ago # -
Now it's time to say thank you
To BLINKY who gave us the cue
To start rhyming limericks
It sure has given us kicks
And an outlet for expression tooPosted 4 years ago # -
vnishmartemmeod -
I must say I'm with you on that one
Blinky, you've given us much fun
I spend all my spare time
wrapped up in five line rhyme
And no longer ever see sun.Posted 4 years ago # -
I think that I've had enough
Of this rhyming limerick stuff
I no longer can work
All my duties I shirk
And I'm looking quite ragged and rough.Posted 4 years ago # -
Mazel tov mazel tov, this is not a ploy
I became an aunt of a lovely baby boy
A vacht nacht and bris
You surely won't want to miss
Baruch Hashem, my heart is bursting with joy!Posted 4 years ago # -
Blinky a big Mazel Tov
This is just the news that I love
A new family member
To help us remember
The gifts of Hashem from above.Posted 4 years ago # -
minyan and veneshmartem- its terrific,
that you thanked me for starting this topic,
appreciation,
causes elation,
And you made me happy real quick!Also just a thing to note
your limericks that you both wrote
Are a lot of fun
I hope your not done
please keep them going- you have my vote!Posted 4 years ago # -
Minyan Gal, i just noticed a beautiful thing,
You have a compliment for everything,
You seem genuinely happy,
On the new birth in my family,
Lets just hope there will be more simchas coming!Posted 4 years ago # -
Mazel tov, Blinky!
Now lets hear the mazel tov we're all waiting for...... (and remember, simcha goreres simcha!)
Posted 4 years ago # -
To make up a limerick is quite cool,
It can be at work or coming home from school
In the spa or when you dine,
Or while you wait your turn on line,
Sitting in traffic, or even by tanning at the pool!And thank you BP Totty:) Amen.
Any more limericks coming? You didn't write one in awhile, You had some good ones......Posted 4 years ago # -
Not any time soon, Blink. The "broken telephone" story I undertook will keep me hopping for at least a week.
Unlike my usual posts, the "telephone" story will require thought!
Posted 4 years ago # -
I gotta save the limerick thread
It's on the bottom almost dead
If no one is going to write
It'll go down without a fight
There, I done it before going to bedPosted 4 years ago # -
Vnishmart I thank you dear
For keeping us a place in here
The Coffee Room would be too drab
If not for our humorous gab
I hope I've made myself quite clear.(vnishmartemmeod - please forgive me for abbreviating your name in this limerick - the full name did not fit the meter correctly) MG
Posted 4 years ago # -
Billy the pest did exist,
He once held a rock in his fist,
It did not miss,
The skunk let out a hiss,
And picked up its tail and went psssssssssssssst!!!Posted 4 years ago # -
foregiveness granted for chopping my name
after all it is only a game
as long as you do not slack
and remember to come back
besides, I'm not looking for famePosted 4 years ago # -
Hi V'nishmartemmeod,
I'd like to offer some kovod,
Your name may be long
So would you think it wrong
If we printed it out in Morse Code?Posted 4 years ago # -
Oomis your idea is pretty interesting,
However morse code can get confusing,
Its quite a load
to write in code
We'll just have to think of something.How about just plain "vnishmart"
I think that sounds very smart,
If you agree,
than thats what it'll be,
Let us know so your new name we can start!Posted 4 years ago # -
Some CR members are Minyan, Doc, and 80,
Oomis, d a, Squeak and Totty,
ICOT and Gavra,
Sac and Kapusta,
Well Informed, Wolf, apusheta, and Blinky!(no offense to anyone who wasn't mentioned- maybe ill come up with another one)
Posted 4 years ago # -
Vnishmart said we were forgiven
To chopping her name we were driven
For meter and rhyme
Took far too much time
When using the name she's now livin'.Posted 4 years ago # -
Around here my name's Minyan Gal
And to all I am really a pal
Although I'm not frum
I just love Coffee Room
And feel welcome by you - the Klal.Although you don't know me so well
My friends really think that I'm swell
For I donate time and gelt
To those that need help
Money's raised by the cakes that I sell.Posted 4 years ago # -
There was a boy named Ned
Who never went to bed
He would stay up all night
In the morn was nice and bright
One day he dropped dead!Had to share my sisters.. From 5th Grade.. was the teachers favorite!
Posted 4 years ago # -
klal, gelt...-sounds pretty frum to me:)
Posted 4 years ago # -
er, beg to differ. If "klal" rhymes with "pal".... <headshake>
Posted 4 years ago # -
Not I- cute. i guess ill also share my sisters..(its goes something like this- dont remember it that well)
There once was a girl in a play,
Break a leg is what they say,
She misunderstood,
And fell on a wood,
And caused a two week delay!Posted 4 years ago # -
Moderators this is for you- Minyan gal asked earlier in this thread to have her name changed to "limerycist' or something, i think its beffitting as she contributed a lot to this thread, so can you change it? (she helped me with my name change so i want to pay her back:) thanx
Posted 4 years ago # -
Thanx mods!!! minyan- how do you like your new name?
Posted 4 years ago # -
Blinquie: I love my new name. Will do a poem about it later when I have more time. Todah Rabah.
Posted 4 years ago # -
There was a Gal, "Minyan" by name.
She desired not to keep it the same.
Her wishes persisted
To be "Limercist"-ed,
And now she's gone on to great fame.Posted 4 years ago # -
A name change Minyan did persist,
Which the mods seemed to have missed,
So i helped her,
Its sounds so much better,
She really is an extraordinaire limericist!Posted 4 years ago # -
oomis one one oh five,
You also keep this thread alive,
Why don't you add some spice,
A name change would be nice,
Maybe a rhyming wive?Posted 4 years ago # -
My new moniker well I adore it
Never heard one quite like this before it
Became my tagline
But by me thats just fine
Hope I don't have to pay to insure it.A kippah I'd love to crochet
But I have not yet learned the way
To hold thread and hook
Cannot fathom the book
So for another's work I'll pay.Posted 4 years ago # -
Whatsa rhyming wive, Minyan Gal?
A name change is not meant to be.
My own suits me just perfectly.
In case you don't know,
I'm attached to it so,
And anything else just ain't ME!Posted 4 years ago # -
I have to say that this thread and the riddle one are my favorites. They really help get my left-brain right-brain working again!
Posted 4 years ago # -
Like a squirrel to acorns
And a two year old to newborns
I am quite attracted to
This limerick-le-do
Like a bee to a rose among thornsPosted 4 years ago # -
Whatsa rhyming wive, Minyan Gal?
Actually oomis i needed to have a word that has the "ive" sound and i know its not a perfect fit but it'll have to do:)
There once was a boy named Ray
Who all he did was sleep all day,
The time before a test,
All he did was rest,
And yet he still scored an "A"!Posted 4 years ago # -
could it be that his rested mind
automatically knowlege did find
by tapping into innate ability
and outputting it with facility
ignoring studying myths of mankindPosted 4 years ago # -
What is it about limericks that enhances your (my!) creative thinking process...? I'm intriqued... as tired as I'll be, I could still squeeze something out of my brain if I'm doing it via limerick...
Posted 4 years ago # -
Once a week i am filled with bliss,
When we dont have it, its sorely missed,
We eat challa and fish,
And cholent so delish,
Baruch Hashem for shabbos!Have a great shabbos everybody!!!!!!
Posted 4 years ago # -
It taps into the left side of your brain, when you rhyme words with a specific meter, and btw, a side benefit for us "old foks" is that it helps exercise the mind, much like a crossword puzzle does.
Posted 4 years ago # -
With serious apologies for my very poor Yiddish. My (very modern and very Zionist) parents sent me to a Hebrew day school and I taught myself to understand Yiddish so that I could understand what my parents were talking about when they didn't want us to know what they were talking about.
Heint is Shabbos - borei prei hagofen
Macht aufen yayin, nisht aufen bromfen
Auf kiddush mir vell essen
A bissel - zolst nisht fressen
Und gayen in der haim tsu shlofen.Shabbat Shalom and Shavuah Tov
Posted 4 years ago # -
Oy - because there is noone hosting
I had to bump this posting
Before it disappears
And drives us all to tears
So please begin some boasting.Posted 4 years ago # -
I am one of the freqent limerick contributors
My amazing talents to showcase, of course
No boasting, I'm too humble
Oops... I'm starting to bumble
I better just get back to my choresPosted 4 years ago # -
vnnishmart and minyan gal,
Thanx for being such a pal,
When this thread is dumped,
You always have it bumped,
I really got to give it to y'all!Posted 4 years ago # -
There was an abuser named Hannity
Who questioned his family's sanity
Doc said his disorder
Is right on the border
Of a very difficult personalityPosted 4 years ago # -
msseeker- love it (welcome to this thread:) Did you make it up?
Posted 4 years ago # -
Yes. Somehow this thread got me thinking about mental illness. We really should start a serious thread on Borderline Personality Disorder, the worst illness b/c the sicko blames everyone else, and so prevalant in our community causing untold chorbonos. Here's another one on depression:
There was a young lady named Raizy
Who seemed quite selfish and lazy
Each morning she said
I'm staying in bed
And everyone thought she was crazyPosted 4 years ago # -
Frogot to thank you for the compliment, Blinky.
Posted 4 years ago # -
Your welcome! Ahhhhh its nice to have a new face here (not to say that im bored of the regulars here...) Keep them coming!
Posted 4 years ago #
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