November 5, 2012 1:18 am at 1:18 am #605688
Post all mashups of quotes, 1 liners sayings etc.
When life gives you lemons, Take em there freeNovember 5, 2012 3:41 am at 3:41 am #1121313
Hello This name is already taken,
This topic is fabulous, with many hilarious possibilities! I have to think here a little bit to see if I can come up with a good one…November 5, 2012 4:11 am at 4:11 am #1121314
A good oldie attributed to Yogi Berra:
“When you come to a fork in the road, take it.”
The WolfNovember 5, 2012 4:20 am at 4:20 am #1121315
“If you love what you do, you’ll never work a day in your life”
I really love this saying…It helped me a lot I am in college and it helped me pick what I would like to major in so I would only pick a major which the career possibilities would only be something I would enjoy….Social Work was my final choice.November 5, 2012 4:56 am at 4:56 am #1121316
“It is said that your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. That is true, it’s called Life.”
“Wisdom comes from experience. Experience is often a result of lack of wisdom.”
“Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened.”
“Give a man a fire and he’s warm for a day, but set fire to him and he’s warm for the rest of his life.”
“If you trust in yourself. . .and believe in your dreams. . .and follow your star. . . you’ll still get beaten by people who spent their time working hard and learning things and weren’t so lazy.”
“Speak softly and employ a huge man with a crowbar.”
(All property of Terry Pratchett. ^_^)November 5, 2012 8:28 am at 8:28 am #1121317
Veni, Vidi, Visa
‘I came, I saw, I went shopping’November 5, 2012 10:19 am at 10:19 am #1121318
Inside every fat girl is a thin girl, and lots of chocolate.
(Also property of TP)November 5, 2012 4:35 pm at 4:35 pm #1121319
Another one of my favorites:
Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. Inside of a dog, it’s too dark to read. ~ Groucho Marx
The WolfNovember 5, 2012 4:38 pm at 4:38 pm #1121320
“Veni, vermini, vomini.”
(Also property of TP)November 5, 2012 8:34 pm at 8:34 pm #1121321
The pen is mightier than the sword. If the sword is very short and the pen is very sharp.
(who do you think?)November 5, 2012 8:41 pm at 8:41 pm #1121322
If at first you don’t succeed, cheatNovember 5, 2012 10:40 pm at 10:40 pm #1121323
Great keep em comingNovember 5, 2012 10:53 pm at 10:53 pm #1121324
“A bird in the hand, spoils the broth”November 5, 2012 10:53 pm at 10:53 pm #1121325
Here is another of the When life gives you lemons sort
When life gives you lemons Eat themNovember 5, 2012 11:37 pm at 11:37 pm #1121326
life is like a box of chocolate- sweet at first, afterwards it gives you a stomach acheNovember 6, 2012 7:31 am at 7:31 am #1121327
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving’s not for you.November 6, 2012 1:40 pm at 1:40 pm #1121328
THE REAL NUDNIKParticipant
*The world is full of willing people, some are willing to work and some are willing to let them
*The easiest way to expand my vocabulary is to make up words
*Some people are no good at counting calories, they have figures to prove it
i collect quotes these are just a few of my collection (i have way over 1000) thanx to everyone that ever posted any of them!!!!!November 6, 2012 3:06 pm at 3:06 pm #1121329
The real nudnik
These are really good.November 6, 2012 3:28 pm at 3:28 pm #1121330
Hey all, this thread is for funny variations of good quotes – not for good quotes themselvesNovember 6, 2012 3:37 pm at 3:37 pm #1121331
When life gives you lemons, make sure to ask for some water, sugar, ice and some tall glasses.
The WolfNovember 6, 2012 5:26 pm at 5:26 pm #1121332
frummy in the tummyMember
I’ll burn that bridge when I come to it.November 6, 2012 6:05 pm at 6:05 pm #1121333
left to writeMember
>if at 1st you don’t succeed, consider making failure your goal.
>keep your eye on the ball, keep your shoulder to the wheel, keep your ear to the ground, keep your nose to the grindstone, keep your back to the wall. Now try working in that position.November 6, 2012 8:51 pm at 8:51 pm #1121334
Time is a drug. Too much of it kills you.November 6, 2012 9:03 pm at 9:03 pm #1121335
>A penny saved is a government oversight.
>If ignorance is bliss why aren’t there more ignorant people in the worldNovember 6, 2012 10:14 pm at 10:14 pm #1121336
People living in glass houses should not.
Before you criticise someone walk a mile in their shoes. That way you’re a mile away from them when you criticise them and you have their shoes.November 7, 2012 6:06 pm at 6:06 pm #1121337
left to writeMember
No man is an island…but Virginia is a state.November 8, 2012 12:07 am at 12:07 am #1121338
do not let he who is without sin live in glass houseNovember 8, 2012 1:10 am at 1:10 am #1121339
Life is tough. Even when sliding down the rainbows you get splintersNovember 8, 2012 1:11 am at 1:11 am #1121340
If you eat glatt meat, buy cholov yisrael milk to go with itNovember 8, 2012 1:13 am at 1:13 am #1121341
Left to write:
pPlease explain. I have a great aunt virginia and she would be very insulted. So I will not tell herNovember 8, 2012 1:20 am at 1:20 am #1121342
Examine your neighbor’s faults with a mirror, not a telescope…November 8, 2012 12:48 pm at 12:48 pm #1121343
If at first you don’t succeed, try failing.November 8, 2012 3:40 pm at 3:40 pm #1121344
Money makes the world go round, and booze increases the speedNovember 8, 2012 4:43 pm at 4:43 pm #1121346
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight
When life gives you lemons, squirt someone in the eye
Don’t be so humble – you are not that great
That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it
heheh!November 8, 2012 4:48 pm at 4:48 pm #1121347
frummy in the tummyMember
Don’t count your chickens before your eggs are all in one basket.November 8, 2012 6:07 pm at 6:07 pm #1121348
when life gives you lemons say “hey! free lemons!”November 9, 2012 5:54 pm at 5:54 pm #1121349November 9, 2012 6:04 pm at 6:04 pm #1121350
Yekke Mitt a GartelMember
>if life gives you lemons, squeeze it in someones eyes
>Lemons are 10% what happens to you and 90% what you make out of it
>Do unto others before they do unto you
>Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them as much
>Whatever doesn’t kill us makes us stronger. And since not lifting weights doesn’t kill us. Therefore not lifting weights makes us stronger
>Success is 1% inspiration and 99% luckNovember 12, 2012 5:23 am at 5:23 am #1121351
Great job keep em comingNovember 12, 2012 6:22 am at 6:22 am #1121352
You are only young once, but you can be immature forever!November 12, 2012 11:42 am at 11:42 am #1121353
My momma always said life was like a box of chocolates, somewhere or other there’s going to be a coconut creme that no-one likes.November 12, 2012 2:13 pm at 2:13 pm #1121354
I asked a friend where my chavrusa was. He told me: “He’s in the place where the king himself goes!”November 12, 2012 2:35 pm at 2:35 pm #1121355
I take my kids everywhere, but they keep finding their way back.
A man’s home is his castle – until the queen arrives.November 12, 2012 3:13 pm at 3:13 pm #1121356
When I married Mr. Right, I didn’t realise that his first name was Always.November 12, 2012 4:05 pm at 4:05 pm #1121357
The journey of a thousand miles starts with a wrong turn.November 13, 2012 12:44 am at 12:44 am #1121360
Hard work has never killed anyone yet, but why take the risk.
I’m on a seafood idet, i see food and i eat it.November 13, 2012 12:46 am at 12:46 am #1121361
Happiness is theonly thing that doubles whenever you share it.November 13, 2012 1:25 am at 1:25 am #1121362
A Byrd in the hand Is worth $10,000November 13, 2012 1:31 am at 1:31 am #1121363
Love these! By the way, these sentences are called paraprosdokians.November 13, 2012 4:43 am at 4:43 am #1121364
nothing tastes as good as skinny cow ice cream
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