Hi David;
Basically, I am you. I have been very wealthy in my lifetime and very destitute; several times over. The daily grind of being impoverished; the stress of owing massive amounts of money, and the toll of long term poverty are a very difficult nisayon. But I do have some very basic words of commiseration/advice for you – and not for your supporters or detractors.
1. Stop focusing on the inability of the financially functional to understand your matzav. That is the way HaShem made human beings.
2. Be VERY HAPPY anytime anyone gives you even the most meager of donations. Give them a brocha and mean it.
3. When you are humiliated by the potential giver; use this humiliation and give the person a brocha. Tell them that you are humiliated, and that even though the feeling is equivalent to death, you would like to use the opportunity to offer a brocha. Be sincere. You have tremendous zchus to give powerful brochas when you are in a state of public humiliation.
4. Consider collecting with your wife and child.
5. Consider moving. I know it’s major, and your current job/support system may not make this even possible, but you my be able to position your family in a better situation by getting out of the city and relocating to a smaller out of town (healthier, cleaner air) community.
6. Attempt to get a letter of recommendation/support from a respected Rav. He should also be able to provide you with direction.
7. On the other side of the Rav’s letter, print your resume. This is not in order to find you a job; which I am sure you and your wife have several; but to help in securing donations.
8. Know that you are in good company. Many of our illustrious forefathers and mothers lived in destitute. Glean comfort from their stories. I know I do!
If you wish, have your wife contact me through YWN and I will swap ideas on how to cook good healthy meals for pennies a day – how to stretch Tomchei Shabbos to last all week, and how to stay positive!
Much Hotzlocha!!
Downandin