These are the data that I have gathered from this discussion:
1. Halacha requires that a shadchan be paid for the service s/he did for the couple and their families.
2. The amount of money to be paid is set by the normal rate in the given community.
3. You or your relative thinks the going rate is $2000.
4. You or your relative is ticked off because s/he commonly receives much less than that amount.
From my perspective, the problem isn’t necessarily that the community is not upholding the halacha, but that your relative has a skewed impression of what the going rate should be. After all, it’s set by the statistics of the people paying, not by what the shadchan thinks it should be. In other words, if 10 people pay $200 and 1 person pays $2000, the going rate goes with the 10, not the 1, irregardless if the 1 high payer is less wealthy than the 10, and also irregardless perhaps of what is paid for other wedding expenses such as flowers or food. A florist is probably paid more than a plumber, even though the latter’s work is more vital.
Avram – so beautifully expressed. And probably much easier to understand than my version(s)