Why davka without a mentor?
Nobody (not saying this in the context of guys, because I have zero experience- just in general) is worth making you change- unless you would want to anyway. Doing something completely for someone else just causes resentment.
Imagine if a guy asked you to wear a purple sheitel because he likes it. Would you do it automatically? People think that because something involves spiritual growth it should be a given that you just do it, but just like anything else it can involve emotional upheaval and require readiness that may not yet be achieved.
Work at your own pace.