What a great post, always runs with scissors fast!
To answer your last question first, NO! Hashem in His kindness granted many gifts, so I don’t feel like a loser. Davka the opposite, I feel the cr is a great tool to HELP other yidden in a way that doesn’t always avail itself in real life.
In addition, there’s quite a bit of learning going on here. You can find lots of divrei Torah and links to shiurim and sfarim. And people are generally helpful and supportive here,even if it’s sharing recipes!
You yourself say that it’s afforded you friendship and motivation, among other things, so that definitely doesn’t satisfy bitul zman!
Hopefully it’s also teaching you not to be judgmental as you were initially, even of yourself.