DY – Should I be? And if I’m not, where do you believe the line should be drawn?
Lior: There should be a semi-public appeal within the community that Plonis Almanah (whomever the widow is) is in need of money to send her children to yeshiva, and the community should raise it. It would be no different than if she didn’t have money for an apartment, or to buy food, where a specific landlord or grocery owner would not be asked to foot the bill just because they are providing the service.
Remember, the Gemorah (and Shulchan Aruch) pasken that public shaming of the parents is appropriate. Since we are dealing with an Almanah and Yesomim, my personal opinion is that it should be avoided if at all possible.
TLIK: Why are parents having children that they are obviously unable to take care of? It is like the old joke goes, that instead of getting a marriage license, couples should be forced to get a “baby” license before having a child. edited
What the Gemorah Kesubos (49B) says:
?? ??? ?? ??? ??? ????? ??? ????? ??? ??? ????? ???? ????? ??? ???? ?? ??? ??? ????? ??? ???? ??? ??? ??? ??? ????? ?????? ?????? ????? ????? ??? ???? ????? ???? ?? ??? ???? ?????? ??? ????
B’dieved, I have gotten calls from people who said their relatives would not be allowed into school unless they raise a certain amount for each child. That may be what is required before people take paying for the services provided seriously, instead of feeling “Magiah Li”. End story is, it is the responsibility of the parents, not the school (unless the parents give up the child, which is a completely different issue).