I’m reading all this, and I SOOOO wish I could be a part of it…and give chizuk….I’m crying right now, I have so much emotions and feelings and things to say and I just don’t know how to put it into writing…
I doubt I have anything too add to any of these people…I’m younger than you…so ya.
I wish I could do something to help, I really, really do.
Keep strong. That’s what they tell me.
Sometimes, I wonder, what exactly IS being strong?
Is it not crying? Putting on a smile and pretending it’s Ok? Fighting back???
None. Being strong means to be able to understand your feeling and deal with them in some way where you aren’t either:
1) Going to sleep till it’s all over
2) An emotional wreck 24/7
It’s okay to break down, have panic attacks, and so on. I mean it’s not okay, but that’s your body releasing it’s emoitions.
With no support group or way to vent or express your feelings besides from here, I ‘d be surprised if you didn ‘t have a panic attack or break down at least once a week.
I do, and that’s okay, cuz Hashem knows, that I can deal with that, till my shaliach comes to teach me other methods.
I suggest something very simple and easy.But on the other hand very hard to do.
Think of something you like to do, if you can’t think of one, find one. Sports, writing, playing a musical instrument or drawing. It dosen’t matter, take that and express yourself through it.
For example, I’m a writer, I write songs, stories, articles, poems, journal, thoughts, to Hashem, To myself, questions…Anything!
When I feel so much things and everything is changing to something else or another feeling every second, I sit and write.
Ex: Q What are feeling?
than I think and write
A. ______, __________, and _______
Q. Why are you feeling that way? what triggered you to feel that way? How can you deal with this feeling? How can it bring you higher? help you improve? what can we learn from this situation, or what he said, or how I reacted? What can I work on? How can I make me better? How can I treat people in the future differently? How can I fix this? Can I call a hotline? Ask a rav, by phone, email, fax, or mail, or in person?
This is just a little of what I do.
You know yourself best.
Search yourself, find yourself, understand yourself.
No one can do that job for you.
I have found most answers lie in me, either I didn’t see them, and I had to think or didn’t want to admit them.
When people ask me, if my life is hard, when they hear something else has gone crazy in my life. I tell them.
Life wasn’t meant to be easy, then It would be boring wouldn’t it???? Than I usually laugh and walk away.
It’s Okay to be sad, it is. It’s okay to cry.
I know someone, she was born without the ability of tears. I feel so bad for her, she was born without the ability to feel, if she gets hurt, physically and emotioanally….an I daven, I daven.
I’m davening, for you, and for every other one in the CR….that all their problems, they should be able to handle and make them stronger.
And that Moshiach should come soon, that this should be the last Tishbiav….