RY, that’s sort of the problem. the others who can’t afford, go into debt to make the same basic wedding. So the thinking is, the wealthier should scale back, but that’s not going to happen.
I would not have been able to afford but have one sibling who can help out. Otherwise I would have told the other side we can’t do this and that. Probably they would have paid the full thing I would think. But it’s not a good way to start the marriage thank G-d we are all getting along well and thank G-d there are grandchildren.