Oomis did not propose a free-for-all, just ways that the system could
be helped to work better, unless you count singles events as such.
(Popa’s second post appears to be guilty of straw-manning.)
Having all messages go through the shadchan creates
a buffer zone for everyone involved, ensuring that no one has difficulty
saying what they need to say because of who it is being said to.
I think we can assume that the shadchanim stay on top of things.
f he did an exact study, why is he giving the results in approximation?
Because nobody really cares to hear that it’s 10 months and 4 days, etc.
However, he does appear to compare the amount of time
a yeshiva bochur’s full shidduchim process takes with the amounts
of time non-Jews or chassidishe bochurim spend on one person.
DaasYochid, can you say with full confidence that the
matter of daters not being comfortable in each other’s
presence has nothing to do with the shidduch crisis?