Reply To:

Home Forums Reply To:

#1059978
someoneMe2
Member

I wouldn’t want it featured in a magazine. I find that magazines tend to do a bad job on these types of things anyway.

I would not venture to speak on anyone else’s behalf, since really, all people, ASD or not are different, but consider the following:

I have tremendous difficulty understanding other people’s intentions when they talk to me. Include sarcasm and, even thought it’s been explained to me many times, I don’t catch it unless you tell me that’s what you’re doing. I also have trouble processing sensory things, especially noise. Sometimes the noise that is overwhelming me might not even be something you can hear.

When I was much younger, I used to have outbursts when things like that happened. I would think people were attacking me (I have no idea if they really were, but based on what I have learned since then about how people socialize, I doubt they always were), or the sensory environment would be driving me crazy and I wasn’t able to deal with it. When I could, I would run away and hide. When I couldn’t, I’d attack my environment, which probably scared many people around me, but in that state of mind I wasn’t able to think clearly about that.

I learned over the years to ask people to clarify what they meant when I don’t understand the implications of what they say. Some people are mean about it and proceed to make fun of me, some just explain it. To those in the former group, it is very hard for me to get past it, but I work on it, because I now understand that your world looks completely different than mine, and in your state of mind someone asking for clarification on such basic statements seems weird and disconcerting.

I also have learned that what you refer to as stimming can help me calm down and avoid getting to the point where I’m so overwhelmed that I can’t even think clearly anymore. I try to do so in a socially appropriate manner – you know, chewing on pens or gum, pacing, etc. If I need to stim in a more obvious way, I go someplace private. But those who would like to fix me say this is inappropriate. To them I would ask, what should I do? I try to avoid situations and people that will make me overwhelmed, but sometimes I can’t if I want to live a functional life. When I become completely overwhelmed, I cannot function. I know that non-autistic people think that if I talk about what’s bothering me I won’t need to stim, but talking when I’m overwhelmed almost always makes things worse, not better.

Most people who did not know me when I was younger do not think I’m on the spectrum, and I generally don’t tell them. they simply think I’m a bit weird, quirky and hyper, so let me ask you, all you people out there who think that everything autistic is terrible and will keep a person from living functionally – if an autistic person can learn to function in a manner that doesn’t harm others and allows them a decent amount of independence, why do you get caught on things like avoiding crowds, chewing pens and asking blunt, straightforward questions? I’m all for teaching people like me social skills. I’d be lost if no one had taught me, but once we’ve learned to interact, is it really so terrible if we’re not all exactly alike? Why do you get angry and punish us when you don’t really even know what is going on inside us?