Someone recently brought his son to R’ Ahron Leib. He held two yarmulkes in his hand, one black velvet, the other seruga. He asked R Ahron Leib, “Is there any difference between these two?”
R AL responded, “No difference.”
The father then said, “Well if they’re the same, then is it fair that my son just got thrown out of his yeshiva because he wore the seruga?”
R’ Ahron Leib responded, “If they’re the same, why can’t he wear the black one?”
Because they may be the same in some ways but not in others.
A red tie and a blue tie are the same ties in a functional sense, but one person may prefer red and the other blue. To ask the person who prefers blue why he won’t wear red if they have the same functionality is to dismiss the concept of personal preference for styles.
Likewise, the two yarmulkes may be the same from a halachic standpoint, but if the kid prefers one over the other and you want him to wear the other, you have to present him a valid reason to do so. Asking “Well, if they’re the same, why can’t he wear the black one?” isn’t a valid reason. It’s a dismissal.
The Wolf