DaasYochid – Absolutely not. But how do I know that the wedding is in Torah V’Yirah (wherever that is) and not in the Palace (wherever that is. Ateres Avraham has been mentioned as a more expensive hall). How do I know that the money is not going to buy an apartment? How do I know that ….. Perhaps that is why Syag Lchochma’s suggestion is appealing, as the fund would only pay out if a minimalist approach is taken (CZ, no custom Shaitels, studio apartment, ikea furniture, etc.) .
I want to delve into a good point that you make. Shelo l’vayesh mi she’ein lo is certainly a Torah concept. However, it doesn’t say the Bas Melech traded with the Bas Ani. There are appropriately haves (and “have lesses”) in the Jewish world, and Chazal recognize as such. There is a minimal standard that should be met (the Gemorah Kesubos says 50 Zuz is appropriate). It is when a maximalist approach is expected, and children are embarrassed when they don’t have what Yenem has, and WE VALIDATE THEIR FEELINGS, then it becomes a non-Torah concept.
P.S. I did a google search for Torah V’Yirah and see it is Satmar. That doesn’t surprise me, as they have their heads screwed on right regarding issues like these.