mord13-
Have you learnt the halachos? Have you read the seforim of the contemporary poskim? Have you spent any time researching the different opinions? Do you realize which Gedolim and Poskim you are calling pathetic?
Clearly not. Your opening statement “the halacha is you are not supposed to have simcha” gives it away. That is not the point. The point is that we are in aveilus. Mourning is not merely the lack of simcha. It is much more than that. When the M.B. says we are supposed to cry for half an hour a day, is that merely to prevent us from having simcha?
The poskim say that in the last generation, when they did not have air conditioning or fans, that the bathhouses were closed for all of the nine days, including Erev Shabbos! I am sure that did not feel too good. Do you consider that pathetic?