here’s an example: how would you feel if you were broke and couldn’t afford a thing and your friend had everything – whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. deprived, right? so if he toned it down and didn’t get himself the world so that he could empathize, you feel more of a connection.
pathetic example, but you get the point. it’s just a way of caring. and no one said torture. just a little holding back.