Reply To: You have two cows

ENVIRONMENTALISM: You have two cows. The government bans you from milking or killing them.

EUGENISM: You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves

REALISATIONALISM: You have two cows. They are for their calves, their milk was never meant for human consumption!

REDISTRIBUTIONISM: You have two cows. Everyone should have the same amount of cow. The government takes both cows, cuts them up, and spends more than the cows are worth giving everyone a little piece of cow.

SOCRATIC METHODISM: How many cows do I have? Why?

ARISTOCRATISM: You have two cows. You sell both and buy one really big cow – with a pedigree.

ARTIST — VISUAL: You have two cows. You stuff them and put them in glass display boxes. In London.

NEW YORK CORPORATION: You have fifteen million cows. You have to choose which one will be the leader of the herd, so you pick some cow from Arkansas.

POLISH CORPORATION: You have two bulls. Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them

CAPITALISM — INTERVENTIONIST: You have two cows. you sell one and buy a bull; you then sell all the excess milk to the government who in turn ships it to fascist and communist governments

CAPITALISM – WALL STREET: You have two cows. You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one. You force the 2 cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts that you have reduced your expenses. Your stock goes up.

I may have done some twice, pardon me