Gavra, they didn’t literally mean black fedoras. Wearing a hat is a reasonable discussion, but nobody really thinks it can’t be an up hat. 😉
Negiah is probably unfortunately true for many, I don’t know about zmanim and tzeddakah, can you be more specific?
I think the frummer MO people such as Sam and DaMoshe would say that negiah is not sanctioned in any official way, it’s just individuals.