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DaasYochid, the Chassidim are in a whole ‘nother dating category. Many of them are NOT ready to get married, as a matter of fact, but they are doing so anyway. OK. If their mehalach works for them, kol hakavod. Their mindset from birth is not the same as the that of much of the rest of the frum world, as it applies to dating, and again, if it works well for them, more often than not, then B”H for that. It is not for me to critique their methodology.
It is about THAT other demographic that I speak, the one that lives in the world where actual boy/girl dating takes place, and not by b’show. In that world, males and females should be mature enough to make their own arrangements for tachlis purposes. All too often you see couples on a date who literally do not know how to date. Why else has it become so popular (and necessary, apparently) to have dating mentors and coaches? Who ever heard of such a thing twenty, thiry, forty years ago? But now, we have infantilized our kids to the point where they do not feel COMPETENT to actively participate in their own future. Either that, or they have become too lazy, to do so. I am not sure which is worse.