I’m sort of on the same page as PBA, only I think what happens is the minute the $ gets tight (or there is the slightest hint that the promised “ois-halt” is not as rock solid as originaly thought) the happy couple comes to terms with the new reality and starts shifting from “full time learning” to a job in the morning or afternoon a few days a week, to a few more days a week, and before you know it, he is working full time, but still under the banner of “still learning”. With many jobs today not requiring 9-5 in NYC, you can “work” yet not attract unwanted attention.
As far as the “what will my friends / neighbors say” syndrome, that’s something I’m working real hard to eradicate from the globe, but so far, no luck.
As far as Tzippi’s comment, there I absolutly agree. The promised “ois-halt” should be based on what the boys “3 years time” earnings potential is. So for example, if the boy’s father is a lawyer or some other sort of proffesional, that makes $100,000 per year, then its reasonable to assume that the son will make 20% of that when he enters the job market 3 years after the wedding. After all, he needs some experience, so 20-25k is a fair start.
That being the case, the MAX a boy like this should get as a “sign-up” pacakge is the projected 3 years starting salary (or $600 – $700 / mo, 3 years cap).
If a boy’s estimated adult earnings (again, based on what is father currently makes) is closer to $50,000, than the “choson package” should be %20 of that $275 / mo, with a 3 year cap)
Not everyone is smart enough or ambitious enough to strike it really rich. So not every choson should get the same starting package. Is he a winner? Let him prove himself. I would love to have my neighbors car.. if I can afford it. If not, tough.
Why should a choson be any different? (and no, I do not have girls… I have boys only, so I CAN talk)