I agree, sem is a scam. It’s promoted as a ‘once in a lifetime experience you’ll never have the opportunity to have again’ and that fear sells. I can’t count how many of my friends went because “If I don’t go, I’ll never be able to have another chance!” That’s so ridiculous! Many girls specifically DO NOT want to go, but their parents and teachers convince them it’s the ‘right’ thing to do to get a shidduch. What is this? Four years in a frum high school wasn’t enough?
Forget about the costs (to the parents! Why are they supporting this nonsense?!) of sending your child to Israel, bringing them home for pesach and/or simchas. Oh yeah, and these sems don’t even host your daughter for the shabbossim she will spend away from home, she has to find ‘hosts’ to have her! AND THEN THESE GIRLS HAVE TO BUY THEIR HOST A GIFT! I heard this first-hand from my classmates who are now in Israel. I couldn’t believe it. They go thru thousands of dollars in spending money, as all the American products they are used to are more costly than they are aware, but who cares if it’s tatty’s money, right?
And let’s not forget about the fact that for every girl saying that sem is so “Amaaaazzziiinggg” there is another who isn’t really enjoying herself, misses home, hates the food, and is counting the days until it’s over. But they’d never admit it. They go along with their friends saying they’re having a great time because ‘everyone else seems to like it’. It’s a sem culture.
I’m glad I made the choice to skip sem. I didn’t have the heart to ask my parents for thirty grand for a big joke. I would’ve had the time of my life, but the price is a little too high for a year-long party.
I’m now at a local college, and I can also say it’s “ammmaaaazzzzinggg”, I’m learning stuff, making friends, and I don’t rely on my (not very wealthy) parents to pay for it, as I also work part-time.