modchebp:
I have no problem with shadchanim being compensated properly for their time and efforts. I simply think your model is seriously flawed.
As i have posted many times (and is being applied in numerous comminuties as we speak) shadchanim should be compensated for achievable results.
What you can NOT do- get people engaged
What you CAN do – set up dates.
if you would like to run it like a business i suggest you let people know ahead of time you do NOT charge to meet a girl/boy nor to review their resume. IF you get a shidduch off the ground you have one fee if it gets to date #4 it has a additional fee.
This way you are compnesated for the results after the fact. No pressure no expectations.
It works fabulously when it is implemented by communites as is presently being done and spreading quickly.
It works because the financial compensation is nice and -just as important -it works becasue HUMANS like being appreciated for their time and effort and resond in kind. It’s part of the makeup of the creature known as people.
However I don’t like and don’t encourage this concept when it’s paid for by the parents becasue it introduces a added factor in considering whether to start and or continue a shidduch.
However, charging for meeting singles/reviewing resumes simply casues ill will as the singles/their families expect the world because they paid, and no human can deliver results (even if measured in terms of dates or even phone calls) for every person/resume they receive.
As for BPT issue with kids being handed things etc. I simply don’t understand what that perhaps legitmate comment has anything to do with the need for people who redd shidduchim to be compnesated properly.
If I may ask. What has my transmission proven?? When it went it cost over 2 grand. same for a root canal. And did I mention the cost to redo a roof……
Why is compensating and appreciating a shadchan somehow linked to a sense of entitlement on the part of the singles???